I have a very dear friend who is going through so much right now because she has made the courageous and tough choice to prosecute her rapist. This process has been made so much harder by the fact that most of her family (including her own mother) is supporting her rapist. This has really gotten me thinking. I wonder if the people who stand behind rapists (and other abusers) really know what they are saying when they decide to support the perpetrator instead of the victim. Having been in a very similar situation I can speak in a very educated way about this. So, without further adieu here is what they say...
When you choose to support an abuser rather than the abused you are saying...
~ I don't believe the abuse really happened, or it wasn't as bad as you say.
~ Your abuser means far more to me than you do.
~ I never really loved you, and you are not worthy of true love.
~ You are not good enough to stand up for.
~ Who cares how much this hurt you, grow up and move on!
~ I don't believe this crime should be punished.
~ The crime that happened was really not a crime at all.
~ Abuse is ok.
~ Your pain is nothing in comparison to the inconvenience you have caused me.
~ Your abuser deserves sympathy and compassion, but you don't.
~ The abuser's loss of freedom concerns me more than your emotional scars.
~ Even though your abuser has confessed (and is therefore guilty) I don't care about protecting other potential victims they might come into contact with (potentially their own children).
~ God's view on justice doesn't matter. (Micah 6:8)
~ What God has to say about those who hurt a child doesn't matter. (Matthew 18:6)
~ What God has to say about the governing authorities executing justice doesn't matter. (Romans 13:1-7)
This list could go on, but I think the point is made. I would encourage you to think about how the choices you make truly do impact others.