Sunday, October 16, 2016

Your words matter!

I hate politics. Usually I completely ignore what everyone has to say about the issues and candidates, research for myself, and then vote. This election cycle has been brutal. I honestly don't care who you vote for, but please read the following before you spew stuff all over Facebook or any other form of social media.

Your words matter! Please think before you post. Trump's words were not "locker room banter" they described assault. They were incredibly triggering for so many people who have been victims of sexual assault. I have many friends who are amazing people who would never knowingly hurt someone and their posts have demeaned those who would be offended and belittled some of the most courageous people I know, survivors. Friends, THIS IS RAPE CULTURE. When we make light of sexual assault, even if it just the description, we are part of the problem. When we claim someone who would say such things is a moral person and defend them, we are part of the problem. When we compare this person's morality with that of another, we are part of the problem. Rape is a serious issue in our culture. 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will experience sexual assault before they turn 18. Reality is you probably know several victims of this horrible crime without even realizing it.

Many victims never tell what happened to them. I probably never would have told if the police hadn't called me 13 years after the fact. Please understand that victims feel ashamed and don't want that shame publicly broadcast so they often never tell until years later, if ever. Please don't discount someone's story just because they waited years to tell.

Please understand that this is not a Trump bashing post. This is my heart to help protect those that are not only being hurt by his words and actions, but also the words and actions of many who seek to defend him. There is no defense for assault, or even joking about assault. It isn't "locker room banter", it is wrong and it is hurting many people.

Sunday, May 1, 2016

When Mother's Day Hurts...

I HATE Mother's Day. There, I said it. I have hated it for years. I go through the motions and act like everything is great for my children, but deep down I hate it.

For years a HUGE part of my heart was missing because I didn't have contact with my oldest daughter. I'm so grateful to be able to have her back in my life! I will admit that this was part of why I disliked Mother's Day, but it was only a very small portion.

Here's the real conundrum for me. My own mother. I love her deeply, and have done what I can to love and protect her. Yet it seems she doesn't return that love. One of the 10 commandments in the Bible is to honor your father and mother. My big question is HOW? How do you show honor to someone who has disowned you because of your stand to protect your children? How do you show honor to someone who stands by the person who brutally abused you as a child? How do you show honor to someone who wants no part in your life?

So for me, Mother's Day is brutal. I love and cherish my children and am beyond grateful for them, but there is still a big hole that may never be filled.  I guess what I need to do is focus on being the best mother I can be for my children. I hope and pray that God will help me be the best mother I can for my own children, and that my children will never have a reason to question my love for them.

This week I will be striving to remember that God can be and is both a mother and father to the parentless. I'm meditating on Psalm 27:10 "When my father and mother forsake me the Lord will take me in". God has always been faithful and I know He will continue to be through the tough days!