Why do I write?

I have been asked why I choose to write and share my story and share my struggles. There are several reasons why I choose to write and share.

1. I choose to write because I remember how alone I felt in my darkest hours. I remember feeling like no one else could possibly understand my pain. I hope I can help someone know they are not alone through sharing my heartache.
2. I choose to write because light must be shone in the dark places. Until people are willing to talk about the bad things and bring to light how damaging abuse is nothing is going to change. I must be a voice speaking light into the darkness. 
3. I want my life story to help other people. That can happen best if I'm transparent and acknowledge that sometimes working through the messiness of life is tough, but we can all help each other through it!
4. HOPE!!!! Sometimes all you need is a glimpse of hope to keep going. I believe seeing how God has done such amazing things throughout the nasty parts of my life will bring hope to others going through their own junk. My desire is to speak life and hope to others!

I guess that's what it all boils down to...HOPE! I want people to know that there is hope for healing after extreme abuse. There is hope that life can get better! I want others to catch even just a glimpse of the hope so they can keep going through life's struggles. 

Sadness

I know I haven't blogged in quite a while. My goal is to get started again. Today my heart is breaking for a sweet 13 year old who was raped and impregnated by a close family member who was a pastor. There just aren't words to express the grief I feel for this child who is undoubtedly experiencing such horrific mental trauma at this point. I decided to write a letter to her. A dear friend of mine asked me to post that letter here, so here it is...

Dear Sweet Child of God,

                I wanted to write you a note to encourage you, to let you know that you are not alone, and to let you know that people who you have never met are thinking about you and praying for you, and already love you.

                Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tina. I too was raped as a child and got pregnant from that rape and had to give my baby up for adoption. I tell you this to help you to know that you truly are not alone. I remember feeling so very alone and like no one could possibly understand the emotions and the pain that I was going through.

                What I know to be true is that rape is NEVER the fault of the victim! I also know that it is ok to cry, the pain is very real. The daughter I gave up for adoption is now 16 and I can honestly tell you God has held true to His promises and has never left me or forsaken me. He has lovingly been with me even at my very lowest points. I know He will be there for you too!

                If you ever want to talk I’d be more than happy to listen.

Please know that you are loved!

Tina