As we approach Friday's surgery I can feel the tension in the house rising. Tim and I are really at peace, but the two older kids are scared for their baby sister (who isn't scared at all), and I think the thought of this surgery is causing fear in their little hearts.
The other day our son hugged his little sister and asked her if she was scared about the surgery. He is really more concerned than she is... She told me she plans on asking for a popsicle and juice box when she wakes up from surgery. I think she thinks it is going to be just like the other ones she has had.
Our oldest daughter came in to snuggle with me this morning and we were talking. She thinks that it isn't fair that her baby sister is getting so much attention. She told me it isn't fair that her sister gets more treats than she does (we sometimes resort to incentives to get meds down). So the oldest daughter and I had a long conversation this morning where I again tried to explain why we do what we do. I also tried to remind her of the times recently that I have taken her out by herself and tried to spend time with just her. I think she is scared and doesn't quite know how to express it.
These are the times in life that it is hard to be a mom. I'm just sad that I don't know how to best help my kids get through their fear, and help them to feel like I'm being fair to all of them. I'm thankful that God promises wisdom if we ask for it, so that is what I have been doing. I'm just praying that God will bring a peace into their little minds and help them to know that their baby sister is going to be ok. Nothing I say to them seems to help at this point, so I'm just trusting that God will comfort them and bring peace to their minds as I try to give them as much love and confidence as I can...
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
Musical Mondays ~ Trusting...
As we as a family approach our youngest daughter's surgery this coming Friday it seems to be becoming more and more real in a way. I would have to say that most moments I'm doing well, and I'm excited at the potential hope we see from this surgery, but there are also moments where I'm a mess. I haven't really cried about all of this since we first found out until last night. Last night I had a few moments of "melt down" so to speak as I was begging God to be with my baby girl and protect her.
As I have spent more time thinking about all of this I'm finding that I think a lot of my issues boil down to trust. Because my trust has been violated so many times in my life by those who should be the ones protecting me I tend to struggle in this area. I'm finding that trusting is a choice. I know this is what we need to do to help her, and that we have the best possible doctor, and that God promises to protect her, so I'm choosing to trust God, and her doctors during this process.
I heard this song last night as I was seeking God, and it hit me again in a good way, so I thought that I would share it with you.
Some of the lyrics that stand out to me right now are:
Give me eyes to see
More of who You are
May what I behold
Still my anxious heart
Take what I have known
And break it all apart
You my God are greater still
No sky contains
No doubt restrains
All You are
The greatness of our God
I spend my life to know
And I'm far from home
To all You are
The greatness of our God
Give me grace to see
Beyond this moment here
To believe that there
Is nothing left to fear
That You alone are high above it all
You my God are greater still
As I have spent more time thinking about all of this I'm finding that I think a lot of my issues boil down to trust. Because my trust has been violated so many times in my life by those who should be the ones protecting me I tend to struggle in this area. I'm finding that trusting is a choice. I know this is what we need to do to help her, and that we have the best possible doctor, and that God promises to protect her, so I'm choosing to trust God, and her doctors during this process.
I heard this song last night as I was seeking God, and it hit me again in a good way, so I thought that I would share it with you.
Some of the lyrics that stand out to me right now are:
Give me eyes to see
More of who You are
May what I behold
Still my anxious heart
Take what I have known
And break it all apart
You my God are greater still
No sky contains
No doubt restrains
All You are
The greatness of our God
I spend my life to know
And I'm far from home
To all You are
The greatness of our God
Give me grace to see
Beyond this moment here
To believe that there
Is nothing left to fear
That You alone are high above it all
You my God are greater still
The whole song is really good, and I hope you find it as encouraging as I do! We as a family appreciate your prayers this week as we walk this road, and try to keep our attitudes up beat and our focus where it needs to be!
Friday, June 8, 2012
Changing the Way I Think - Part 2
As I look back over the notes there are just a few more things that stand out to me (see Part 1 here). I have found that changing the way I think can change my whole view on life, and therefore make me a much happier person! Here are a few more things that I have found helpful when seeking to apply Philippians 4:8 to my life.
~ Junk-proof your mind...
~ A healthy mind is one that works for you instead of against you.
~ You are always affirming something in your life because you are always thinking...
~ Choose to affirm the good.
~ Memorize Scripture to help keep your mind filled with the good.
~ If you are going to be serious about having a positive mindset you have to limit your exposure to negativity.
~ Living with Gratitude is a great way to defend your joy!
~ Gratitude is the cornerstone of an unstoppable attitude.
~ Gratitude is a conviction, a practice, and a discipline
~ Gratitude is a choice. (I Thessalonians 5:18 says to give thanks in ALL circumstances)
These are some of the things that I'm really choosing to focus on in my life right now. I'm choosing to be thankful that we have finally found out what is wrong with our youngest daughter, and that she can be helped rather than worrying about the surgery. I'm choosing to dwell on what is good and right. That doesn't mean that there aren't times negative thoughts don't creep in, it just means I choose not to dwell there. I choose to focus on the goodness of my God and be thankful for the many blessings I have in my life.
~ Junk-proof your mind...
~ A healthy mind is one that works for you instead of against you.
~ You are always affirming something in your life because you are always thinking...
~ Choose to affirm the good.
~ Memorize Scripture to help keep your mind filled with the good.
~ If you are going to be serious about having a positive mindset you have to limit your exposure to negativity.
~ Living with Gratitude is a great way to defend your joy!
~ Gratitude is the cornerstone of an unstoppable attitude.
~ Gratitude is a conviction, a practice, and a discipline
~ Gratitude is a choice. (I Thessalonians 5:18 says to give thanks in ALL circumstances)
These are some of the things that I'm really choosing to focus on in my life right now. I'm choosing to be thankful that we have finally found out what is wrong with our youngest daughter, and that she can be helped rather than worrying about the surgery. I'm choosing to dwell on what is good and right. That doesn't mean that there aren't times negative thoughts don't creep in, it just means I choose not to dwell there. I choose to focus on the goodness of my God and be thankful for the many blessings I have in my life.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Changing the Way I Think
The very first series that we heard when we started attending our new church was one titled "Think four:eight". This series was so well timed in my life and revolutionized the way that I thought. The whole series revolved on how to apply Philippians 4:8 to your life.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things.
I found myself going over the notes from this old series today. I have done this occasionally in the last 2 years when I need a reminder of how to change my thought processes. Over the next couple of days I'll share a couple of the things that still stand out to me when I read over the notes.
~ Your thoughts are powerful...
~ It's your choice what you choose to dwell on.
~ In life there will always be some junk and some greatness
~ Your future is not determined by your past
~ Where do you dwell? (on the good or bad)
~ There are Three Laws that can guard our minds and change our hearts....and give us emotional strength
~ The Law of Attention - Whatever you emphasize increasingly becomes what you are
~ The Law of Exchange - you can do away with a negative thought only when you replace it with a positive
~ The Law of Reversibility - act like you are.
Our Pastor challenged us with something during that series that I needed to be challenged with again today... "Beginning today, commit to increase your potential for starving worry, fear and doubt and other negative thoughts and commit to nourishing your mind, attention and conversation by imitating Christ's."
My goal is to think on whatever is true, right, pure, holy, etc... especially as we as a family prepare for our youngest daughter's surgery next week.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Our Youngest Daughter's Surgery
This post is from both my husband and myself...We are working on it together.
We have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of love, support, and prayers we have received since Tina's last post. Tina was simply sharing how God worked in her heart once again and we have been blessed by the notes and comments we have received.
To answer some questions... Our youngest daughter has Chairi Malformation Type 1. The link gives good info, but in a nut shell her cerebellum (the bottom part of her brain) is pushing into her spinal chord. This is a birth defect, and it has only recently (last couple of months) been discovered. Chairi can be somewhat difficult to diagnose at times, but with an MRI it can often be clearly seen. Chairi is definitively diagnosed when the cerebellar tonsils (read brain) extend down 3-5 mm (some sources say "normal" is -1). Our daughter's extends down 9-10 mm. (the Dr interpreting the MRI said 9 and the surgeon said 10).
She has had health problems from the beginning and has had multiple hospitalizations and surgeries. She takes lots of different medication on a daily basis to keep her breathing, digesting food properly, etc. She has also struggled all of her life with frequent infections, headaches, and sleep apnea. Her team of doctors believe that this surgery will really do a lot to help her, and we have faith that God will use it to bring her great relief!
There are obviously risks involved with this surgery, but really the greatest one for her with her history is infection. We would appreciate your prayers that God would just have His hand on the surgeon, and on our daughter's little body, and that He would work a miracle in her little body through this surgery!
Tim and Tina Anderson
We have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of love, support, and prayers we have received since Tina's last post. Tina was simply sharing how God worked in her heart once again and we have been blessed by the notes and comments we have received.
To answer some questions... Our youngest daughter has Chairi Malformation Type 1. The link gives good info, but in a nut shell her cerebellum (the bottom part of her brain) is pushing into her spinal chord. This is a birth defect, and it has only recently (last couple of months) been discovered. Chairi can be somewhat difficult to diagnose at times, but with an MRI it can often be clearly seen. Chairi is definitively diagnosed when the cerebellar tonsils (read brain) extend down 3-5 mm (some sources say "normal" is -1). Our daughter's extends down 9-10 mm. (the Dr interpreting the MRI said 9 and the surgeon said 10).
She has had health problems from the beginning and has had multiple hospitalizations and surgeries. She takes lots of different medication on a daily basis to keep her breathing, digesting food properly, etc. She has also struggled all of her life with frequent infections, headaches, and sleep apnea. Her team of doctors believe that this surgery will really do a lot to help her, and we have faith that God will use it to bring her great relief!
There are obviously risks involved with this surgery, but really the greatest one for her with her history is infection. We would appreciate your prayers that God would just have His hand on the surgeon, and on our daughter's little body, and that He would work a miracle in her little body through this surgery!
Tim and Tina Anderson
Sunday, June 3, 2012
He's Been Faithful Before, He'll Be Faithful Again!
While we were worshiping at church this morning God really spoke to me. We were singing this song and God used it to remind me of His goodness. The chorus says:
I call your name Lord you reply
You bring your kingdom
To stand by my side
Giver of life All that I need
Father you're everything that is precious to me
There is no one like you Lord in all the earth
I call your name Lord you reply
You bring your kingdom
To stand by my side
Giver of life All that I need
Father you're everything that is precious to me
There is no one like you Lord in all the earth
We are once again walking a tough road as a family. Our baby girl who is now 4 will be going in for brain surgery in the near future (we are waiting on insurance approval). I'm fully confident that God will use this to bring great healing to her little body! God used the chorus of this song to remind me that in the past He has been so faithful! I really felt like during the week of trial He did bring His kingdom to stand by my side. I'm resting in the knowledge that He will do that again! I'm so thankful that I serve a God who loves us and is all I need!
Looking in the past I can see His faithfulness, and I'm trusting his faithfulness will help our family walk this next tough road!
Friday, June 1, 2012
The changing power of Thankfulness
I sometimes find it so easy to get caught up in the craziness that is life that I get so overwhelmed with what is going wrong around me. When this happens I tend to get discouraged and even moody...(not something I like to admit ~ just being real here). One thing that I found can "snap me out" of this kind of funk so to speak is writing down what I'm thankful for. When I stop to think about all of the blessings that I have it really changes my perspective! I love this song by Josh Groban ~ Thankful ~ it is such a good reminder to me that there is so much to be thankful for. When we stop to think about all of the things we have to be thankful for it somehow seems to change our perspective on life.
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